Cleaning is torture.

Chinese water torture, electric shock, flagellation, and other torture methods do not seem too unusual or cruel when compared to cleaning. At least not after today.

As some of you know, I am or was unemployed for a period of a day, and word got around and I suddenly got a cleaning job. Yippee. I have done cleaning jobs in the past such as hotel housekeeping, and janitorial duties at my university. I figured I'm used to it, so it couldn't be that bad. Oh, boy.

The first place wasn't too bad, just some dusting, vacuuming, etc. When we got to the second place, it suddenly dawned on me how much I hate cleaning. Cleaning up after someone else's filth because they were too lazy to do it themselves just does not appeal to me. And this place was nasty. Not only did we have to clean it, but we had to 'deep clean' it as well. Something a normal person does and would only want to do maybe once or twice a year. But we are doing it all day, and everyday.

There is also nothing to distract or entertain you while you are cleaning. No music, no television, no good conversations with a fellow friend. Just you, the thing you are scrubbing, and your thoughts. But mainly my thoughts are just, "Man, this will not come out." or "I can't believe I am going to stick my hand in that," or "This sucks, this sucks, I think I would rather jump off a bridge." Enough to drive a person mad. After about five hours of cleaning, I decided that I needed to tell her that I wouldn't be able to work for her any longer.

After we finished up for the day she drove me home. As we approached my driveway she asked, "So you wanna work tomorrow then?"

Perfect timing to break the news. But instead of quitting, I heard myself say, "Sure!"

"I'll see you at 5:30 then!"

"Okay, 5:30!"

I slowly went into the house. I was happy to be home, but couldn't believe I was going to put myself through the same torture tomorrow. I sat at the kitchen table and my brother and sister-in-law asked me how it went. And I told them.

They made me realize that I needed to just quit and today. So I called her up and explained to her that I could work tomorrow, but that I didn't think I was a good match for the job.

"It sucks, huh?" she asked.

"I just don't think I'm cut out for it"

"Cleaning sucks, huh?"

"Yeah..." I finally agreed.

I hope cleaning ladies make bank off their job, because it really does suck. I think if someone offered me fifty million dollars to clean for just one year, I would still decline. One more day is all I can handle.